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Pun Intended for Nothing In Particular #6

written by: thaibob
 
Continuing with a hodge-podge of nothing in particular are more PUNS (Please keep this in mind). If you want more of this foolishness, just do a search for "Pun Intended" or click on "Thaibob".

Question 1:


Motel operators never die, they just _________________.
make room for others.
turn off the lights.
check out.
roll up the rug.

Question 2:


'I got lost in the streets of Paris,' he said _____________.
amazingly
sadly
ruefully
eyefully

Question 3:


The sledder who got injured realized that his wounds were more than __________________.
the cost of his sled
he tobogganed for
he bargained for
a runner's mistake

Question 4:


What is the home for rich squirrels?
The Nutcracker Suite
Squirrel Hotel
Squirrel/Chipmunk Motel
The Nutcracker King Motel

Question 5:


My blind date's ______________.
a dog's best friend
from another planet
a real corker
not looking good

Question 6:


I'm reading a book about mazes, (Next sentence please)
I didn't know how to turn the pages.
I just cut to the end of it.
I quit.
I got lost in it.

Question 7:


A plumber's pipe dream was to tap all his resources to become _______________.
wrenched to the top.
tap king
multifaceted
multifauceted

Question 8:


Earl Grey was away on business during the election. (Next sentence please)
So he cast an absentee ballot.
So he cast an absinthe ballot.
So he cast an absent-tea ballot.
So he cast an absent-tee ballot.

Question 9:


The wolf tried to sing, _______________.
but he didn't know how
but his teeth caught all the notes
but he didn't know howl
but the dogs drowned him out.

Question 10:


A weeknight is a ___________.
time after working
Monday through Friday
terrible night
tiny nobleman

Question 11:


My father slept under the bed. (Next sentence please)
Mother hated to sleep with another.
He loved to sleep with the dust bunnies.
I think he was a little potty.
Mother was a holy roller.

Question 12:


I tried to look up impotence on the Internet but _________________.
I couldn't spell it.
nothing came up
the computer just quit
I did have the guts.

Question 13:


I wanted to bring a penguin home but my parents said _____________________.
you can train a dog much easier
we're not going to live in a freezing house
it smelled too fishy
that was not going to fly

Question 14:


This year I made my Christmas wreath out of Franklin Fir branches. (Next sentence please)
I hate those fake ones.
They're very patriotic.
I really like a wreath of Franklin.
I wanted Washington Fir but they were sold out.

Question 15:


The stripper was getting tired of the ___________________.
leering of the breasts dance
clothes, no clothes routine
same old song and dance
same old thong and dance

Question 16:


An instructor at an ice cream parlor is a __________________.
Sundae schoolteacher
journalist who gets great scoops
real treat
Sunday schoolteacher

Question 17:


My friend's bakery burned down last night. (Next sentence please)
You could smell the lovely fumes for miles.
Now his business is toast.
Call it a burn for the wurst.
He had too many buns in the oven.

Question 18:


An avionics warning is a _____________.
warning for bees
fire alarm
plane lookout alarm
flier alarm

Question 19:


When the pharmacist found out her husband was having an affair, ______________________.
she knew how to concoct the undetectable poison
it caused her to pharm out her business
it was a hard pill to swallow
she called it 'medicinal suicide'

Question 20:


If you accidentally leave your fly down on a promising date, does that count as a ____________?
real downer
lost cause
Freudian zip
Freudian slip

 


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