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Pun Intended for Nothing In Particular #5

written by: thaibob
Continuing with a hodge-podge of nothing in particular are more PUNS. Please keep that in mind. If you want more of this foolishness, just do a search for "Pun Intended" or click on "Thaibob". Read the questions carefully.

Question 1:

When video arcades switched to a system of tokens, there was no ____________________ .
nobody in attendance
person who had tokens
place to change money to tokens
quarter asked or given

Question 2:

To make sure cargo trucks aren't too heavy, police operate on the principle that ________________________.
something is rotten in the state of the cargo hold
where there's a wheel there's a weigh
it must be too heavy because the tires look tired
where there's a will there's a weigh

Question 3:

I can't drink milk. (Next sentence please)
I lactose genes required to digest it.
I'd rather drink some udder beverage.
I lack those genes required to digest it.
I hate it.

Question 4:

This girl said she recognized me from the Vegetarian Club ___________________________.
she must have been mis steak en.
but I was eating steak at the time
but I'd never met herbivore
but I'd never met her before

Question 5:

The boy who got electrocuted was unable to give a statement because he was ____________________.
in a coma like trance
sizzling with excitement
still shocked at the incident

Question 6:

The best floor exercise gymnasts come from ____________________.
Palm Springs
Hot Springs
Colorado Springs
Sandy Springs

Question 7:

When you purchase stuff south of the border, ___________________________
the eye in the sky is watching
you don't peso much
bargaining is the key word
none of these

Question 8:

The dermatologist was an avid gardener but he had a problem with _________.

Question 9:

As the farmer passed the gorgeous woman he did everything he could ___________________.
to sew the seeds of romance
before he ran out of gas
to a tractor attention
none of these

Question 10:

When the spammer's computer exploded, ________________________.
he immediately went into cardiac arrest.
so did all of his spam
it blew him to kingdom come
it blew him to kingdom.com

Question 11:

I used to think I was indecisive, but _______________________.
I finally made up my mind
reality struck me in the face
now I'm just a liar
now I'm not so sure

Question 12:

Studying earthquakes really rocks, but sometimes it's not always ____________________.
my fault when things go wrong
the subject to study considering the dangers involved
what it's cracked up to be
along straight lines

Question 13:

__________ is a ______________ hobby.
Sewing - boring
Weeding - back breaking
Knitting - lousy
Nitting - lousy

Question 14:

A used car is not always __________________.
what it's cracked up to be
the choice of new car buyers
what it's jacked up to be
old and tyred

Question 15:

I think I screwed up with the construction. (Next sentence please)
I couldn't nail it
I screwed up the final phase.
There was no bathroom or kitchen.
I bolted too soon.

Question 16:

The author in northwest Alaska used a pen name. (Next sentence please.)
Do you know what it is?
It was a Nom de plume.
It was a Nome de plume.
Juneau what it is?

Question 17:

Is the training given to expectant parents ___________________?
home delivery

Question 18:

We should make a beer commercial. (Next sentence please.)
It certainly would be exhilarating,
We could BOTTLE it up and sell it.
It sounds simply intoxicating.
It CAN be kind of fun.

Question 19:

Neuter your dog - an ounce of prevention is better than ______________.
a pound of curs.
a pound of cures.
a house of pups

Question 20:

He thinks octopuses are creepy, and he __________________.
will take up arms to defend his position
makes no bones about it
goes arm in arm with others who feel the same way
refuses to go to the aquarium


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