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Pun Intended Seriously

written by: thaibob
 
Continuing with this silly series of puns that are too crazy to pass up, I hope that you will take this quiz and meditate on the seriousness of the questions and answers. If you do, you will create an aura of brilliance around your body that only a complete moron could pass through. Good luck.

Question 1:


A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of __________.
mass destruction
bouncing betty
math disruption
serious damage

Question 2:


A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, ________.
“No change yet.”
"what boy?"
"he's still looking for the toilet"
"he's already been discharged"

Question 3:


There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. (Add the next sentence).
No pun in ten did.
He won a puncil.
He laid down a punt and was thrown out at first base.
He was punted out.

Question 4:


When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a ___________.
loving feeling
mouthful of bones
whole lotta nuttin'
taste of religion

Question 5:


It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in _______.  (place mouse pointer over ? icon to view hints or answer requirements)
tiers
layers
tears
eruptive hilarity

Question 6:


A man needs a mistress just to break the __________.
monogram
monogamy
monopoly
monotony

Question 7:


In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your ______________.
mother-in-law that votes
vote that doesn't count
wife that votes
count that votes

Question 8:


Did you realize that the guy who invented the doorknocker got a _________ .  (place mouse pointer over ? icon to view hints or answer requirements)
No-Bull prize
Nobel prize
punch in the face
No-bell prize

Question 9:


Newsflash - All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. As of now, it appears the police ___________ .
are all choked up with tears
haven't a clue
have nothing to go on
are completely stumped

Question 10:


A three-legged dog walked into a saloon in the Old West. He sidled up to the bar and announced, “I'm looking for the man ____________."
who shot my maw."
who left me home alone."
who shot my papa."
who shot my paw.”

 


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